You know the ‘Old Man Yells At Cloud' joke in The Simpsons. Well, hello, maybe I'm that man. *Clenches fist and yells at cloud*

The Simpsons is now 35 years in—quality be damned—and it will never end. Unlike some people who think the show should be put out of its misery, I'm actually glad that it just keeps on going. It's doing no harm and we don't have to watch it if we don't want to. As a classic, there will always be someone new beginning to watch it for the first time, which is where I begin to yell.

There is a generation with no attention span that will never watch the couch gag or see Bart's chalkboard lines. And that's just sad. I was disappointed, no, horrified to see that my daughter, who has recently discovered The Simpsons, and has been slowly working her way through the classic era, has in fact been clicking on the ‘Skip Intro' button at the start.

Coming downstairs early one morning, I found her already watching. I quizzed, “Did you know that each episode has a different opening?”, to which she responded “Yeah”, barely listening as she watched on. “Do you ever watch them?”, “Sometimes—can you move out of the way?” she demanded as I stood in front of the TV to get her attention.

Now with all of the options in the world ever, all at your fingertips, my daughter isn't really a ‘variety is the spice of life' kind of girl and is in fact just bingeing all of her favourite shows. Something I never got the option to do as a kid, and given the option, wouldn't I just watch all of The Simpsons back-to-back? If I did, wouldn't I get sick of the intro after the 10th episode that day? No, I would suffer Lisa's playing and wait patiently for the couch gag like God (Matt Groening) intended.

I act as though I didn't have access to DVDs I could binge, but fast forwarding just means you have to make a little bit more effort holding the button and getting off the couch to change disc, making you consider if it's even worth continuing watching. I say this as I look at a pile of unwatched 4K Blu-rays just out of reach.

In reality, when she doesn't skip the intro on her favourite new shows it's actually far worse than missing the couch gag, listening to Nickelodeons' The Loud House or Disney's Phineas and Ferb on repeat has me wishing there was only CBBC or CITV, and I only had to suffer an intro once a week. Once a week? I may even grow to enjoy the songs.

Talking of Disney's Phineas and Ferb and its catchy, but annoying after 100+ listens intro song, Today is Gonna be a Great Day, randomly by Girl All The Bad Guys Want's Bowling For Soup. Phineas and Ferb had reached its natural conclusion and their ‘104 Days of Summer Vacation' had finally ended. I was happy that I didn't have to listen to it any more as my daughter binged through all four seasons and the numerous spin-off films on Disney+. 104 days of summer works out to about 137 episodes if you're interested.

Phineas and Ferb ended around 9 years ago, but the same generation that skipped The Simpsons are watching P&F on Disney+. This same generation that is tormenting me with their inconsistent intro watching habits, I can only assume are watching Phineas and Ferb en masse. So by complete coincidence, the same week that my daughter finished bingeing all four of the original seasons, Disney brought back Phineas and Ferb. Thank you, Disney, thank you.

Now when I said that keeping The Simpsons going doesn't do any harm to anyone, I forgot about the poor people whose kids don't skip the intros and couldn't give a damn about what Bart is writing on the chalkboard and are going insane.