Most people who are set to sit down and watch You Hurt My Feelings will likely feel some trepidation — particularly reviewers like myself. Writer and director Nicole Holofcener dissects honesty in close relationships; mostly when it comes to subject matter revolving around our professions. Such a concept seems more at home in a short rather than a feature form. But, the extended time means that Holofcener and her cast can dig deep into the themes at play, without overstaying their welcome. Across the board, the cast is sharp; particularly Louis-Dreyfus and Tobias Menzies. They both portray such lived-in characters, but also possess incredible comedic timing for the film's numerous lighter moments.
You Hurt My Feelings gets off to a slow start. It competently introduces the characters, but there isn't anything about them that makes them particularly empathetic — just simply likeable. As a dramedy, there's a few jokes peppered in each scene, even though they merely elicit a chuckle at best. Thankfully, things become more interesting when the inciting incident kicks off.
When Louis-Dreyfus' Beth overhears her husband harshly critiquing her current work in progress, there's a great balance of comedy and tragedy. Reacting so dramatically naturally produces some laughs (she nearly physically throws up at one point), but there's also a very real pain that Beth is facing because of her husband's white lie. It's refreshing to see such a simple concept taken seriously and put under a cinematic microscope. Holofcener deftly gets across the insecurity we feel when our work is critiqued, particularly by our loved ones. There is also the betrayal we feel and the impact of what many of us think of as a little white lie. Is it better to lie to our loved ones and fill them with encouragement and avoid confrontation, or to tell the truth and risk conflict? There is sort of an answer by the time the credits roll, but there's also interesting dynamics introduced that complicate the question. The film breezes through each scene, provides some interesting introspection, and then the credits roll.
And that's You Hurt My Feelings' biggest problem. There's something missing, some kind of spark that elevates this from just being fine into something truly riveting that the talent and synopsis on paper suggests. Maybe the concept isn't cut out for a feature after all, or Holofcener doesn't utilise other production elements outside of her script & cast to tell her story. It's not a bad film by any means, but it's not a feature you'll be thinking about for long after first-viewing.
